Working for a… Cult?

Intro

After returning from a year of backpacking, I arrived home to England full of lifelong memories but also lacking in direction, money and about to turn 30. To pay my way, I found myself working as a temp for a construction company. It was local to where myself and my partner had decided to situate ourselves in the UK. It was my first offer – put on the table much sooner than I had anticipated. It was temporary, within walking distance and well paid.

Members of the PBCC refer to themselves as ‘the community’. You and I, are ‘worldly’ folk and us worldly folk (and I know you’re worldly because you’re reading this. And if you’re not, then tut tut) are ‘non-community members’ or ‘non-comms’ for short. I never knew if that was an attempt at being derogatory. But then, being derogatory isn’t very Christian, so probably not.

The community follow a stringent set of rules, most of which were imposed in the late 60’s by their then leader, Jim Taylor Jr. Whilst across the pond Charles Manson was brainwashing his followers using LSD and The Beatles, Jim Taylor Jr was instilling the fear of God into his. Jim passed away in 1970 shortly after ‘The Aberdeen Incident’ whereby he drunkenly demanded married women to his bed. Were the elaborate rules that still stand today established to ensure good and proper Christian living? Or was the Draconian code enforced to make people comply by limiting free thinking? I have my own opinion and lucky for you, you’re entitled to yours.

Basic Rules Include

• Education within their own schools (leaving the curriculum open to amendments by the Elders. Goodbye evolution).
• No university.
• No music (unless performed by fellow Brethren).
• No novels or newspapers.
• No TV.
• No eating or drinking with non-comms.
• No voting.
• No dating.
• No pets.
• No holidays.
• Brethren must only work for Brethren run businesses.
• No sleeping under the same roof as a non-comm (detached homes only & no hotels. It would seem hospitals are an exception).
• No swearing.
• No blasphemy.
• Men mustn’t wear ties, have long hair or facial hair.
• Women mustn’t wear trousers or make-up. They must wear their hair down with an accessory, like a clip or headband.
• Women wear a wedding ring, men do not.
• Everyone attends ‘church’ 7 days a week.

Children must continue to live with their parents until they are married. Unsurprisingly, marriage typically happens at a relatively young age. Once the un-sex educated virgins manage to successfully navigate intercourse, no protection is to be used.

Today, the PBCC have even more technology to contend with so the rules also extend to no internet & no social media. With computer usage now a necessity in any business, God fortuitously changed his mind in 2005 and made them OK for business use. I have honestly never known so many people to actively use LinkedIn, a business purpose social media that has seemingly received the seal of approval by the big man himself. Somebody call Jeff Weiner. Linkedin’s strapline needs updating.

With regards to mobile phones, they are purchased through their own suppliers and are restricted to block social media apps, amongst others. On April 18^th 2019, there was a buzz around the office. Something big had happened and I could sense it. Turns out BBN had announced its forthcoming closure. WTF is BBN I thought.

The Office

On reflection my initial impressions were undeniably naive. It’s important for me that, you the reader, understand that prior to accepting this role, I had never heard of the Brethren and that the interview process did nothing to deter me. The culture seemed entrepreneurial, the offices modern & the people kind. Plus, it was far more established and structured than another small company I had previously worked for. So, when I was offered the position at the end of the interview to start Monday, I was thrilled and I accepted.

The interviewees politely asked if I could spare some time to speak to a non-comm member of staff before I left, to help me get an idea of what it was like to work there. I eagerly obliged. What a nice touch I sincerely thought. I was shortly greeted by a woman who promptly filled me in on the dos and don’ts of the office. “You can wear trousers, but you might get looked at funny”. “Definitely no swearing, save that shit up for when you get home”. A matter of fact, yet oddly humorous ‘them and us’ description was delivered. All of a sudden, something I had never even considered to exist, let alone be an issue, had piqued my intrigue. Never one to deprive my curiosity, I spent the weekend with the word cult reverberating around my head while I prepared for my first day at the office.

You can wear trousers, but you might get looked at funny & definitely no swearing!

The business was formed by an immediate family with dad (the founder), the eldest son (the MD) and the youngest son (director of a department). Nepotism was prevalent within the business. The majority of senior positions were reserved for uncles, cousins, brothers-in-law and others that were presumably held in high regard by the church. I did see a couple of non-comms in senior positions, but even they had something in common with the family. If you’re wondering what the common denominator is, you need not look further than their penises.

Whilst I worked for the company of approximately 55 people, 75% of employees were community members. Following my departure, there are 6 women working full time there, 2 of which were community. To clarify, I didn’t get the impression that the people running the business necessarily wanted it this way. It just seemed, well, non-optional.  I couldn’t help but wonder if we, the non-comms in the business, were the right people for the job, or just a box ticking exercise. Probably, I think, we were a mixture of both. That’s not aiming to put anyone down, the non-comms I met working there were more than capable of their roles & fantastic people. But that’s coming from someone who was allowed to eat lunch with them.

Brethren Women

I was instantly fascinated by the Brethren women. It became quickly apparent that the men did not and would not clean up after themselves. After a meeting, the conference table littered with empty cans, paper cups, mugs and biscuit wrappers, would be abandoned by the men. The PA to the sales director (and just about everybody else) was a middle-aged woman who had never married & still worked full time. So, you can guess what else she’s never done. And no, I’m not just talking about moving into her own place, although that too because, rules are rules (unless you’re a man at the top of the hierarchy). This woman, free of men in her life, exuberated more confidence than all the other mumbling and timid Brethren women I met combined. She worked hard, long hours, but questioned her own ability at every turn. I dread to think how much she was underpaid.

Further to the prohibition of donning a pair of leggings and tying their hair up, Brethren women are inhibited from so many choices most of us take for granted. The more I learned, the more uncomfortable I felt. I’m sure no one is pointing a gun at them and forcing them down the aisle, but if the alternative is to live with your parents for the rest of your life, what would you do? (No offence to my parents who generously let me impose whenever I feel like it).

Brethren women are expected to give up working once they’ve had children. They cook, clean their ginormous homes & bring up their children. It doesn’t sound like a bad life. In fact, I’m sure I know a few women who would aspire for that life. The difference is, it would be their choice.

During my stint here, a non-comm HR lady started. She was awesome, wore power suits, had short hair and took no nonsense. Within 4 weeks she had disappeared, never to be seen again. She was not replaced.

Brethren Men

It’s clear that the Brethren world is a man’s world, but was the quality of life really better for the Brethren men? My impression was that the men had an intense level of pressure on them. The business had to be a success and, I guess similarly to any male dominated office, there was a lot of dick swinging in meetings. Figuratively speaking of course.

Many of the men personally invested in the business worked extremely long hours. Whilst the duty of ‘church’ meetings called at 6PM daily and people were generally out of the door by 5, people would arrive at the office incredibly early. Minimal sleep was inspirational and not discouraged. It would not be uncommon to come in and find emails sent during the wee hours of the morning. I remember thinking a lot about the fact that if I wasn’t allowed to do anything recreational, I might have done the same.

Whilst you might be thinking, that doesn’t sound so bad… I witnessed a certain member of staff ‘burn out’ in front of my eyes. In the 6 months from my starting to my departure, he changed from this smiley, intuitive, ‘genius’ as he was often referred to around the office, to someone who physically aged 10 years in front of my eyes and would struggle to keep his eyes open in meetings. I remember once watching his eyes roll into the back of his head over and over as he struggled to stay awake. I felt awful that the culture was not to admit or talk about this kind of thing. But, ‘holidays’ or time off just don’t exist in Brethren life. He was eventually signed off for a period of time but I can’t say I noticed an improvement upon his return. I think perhaps there was a level of shame to being signed off which probably did nothing to ease the stress and pressure he must have been under.

Infuriating Nepotism

And, just like in any office, there were those eager to please and those happy to drift by fulfilling the bare minimum. In the department I sat with, it was the family member running the department who did sweet FA. it was the one who came from a humbler background, who went to the ends of the earth to do a good job. It was incredibly frustrating to witness. I’ll give some pseudo names… Let’s call the hard worker Aidan and the other one (I can’t think of a polite word to describe him) Dick.

Being related to the MD, it very much seemed that Dick was able to stomp around the office doing and saying whatever he wanted with absolutely zero repercussion. He rubbed people up the wrong way, put his foot down wherever he could to assert his authority and trampled all over any new and innovative ideas. He liked to be in charge, things had to be done his way.

He would miss meetings and return to the office with his hair freshly cut. He would call meetings that would start when it suited him and ended when it suited him, even if they over ran by 2 hours. Meetings mostly entailed the group talking him through doing his own work. We would spend hours, sitting and watching him fill out spreadsheets that should have been done on his own time. He notoriously didn’t read his emails. I won’t even start on the climate denier and racist conversations he would casually bring up to affirm his opinion on.

On the other hand, Aidan was an overachiever, he frequently had bright ideas for the business and genuinely seemed to care about its success. To put this into a sports metaphor that oh so many small businesses like to use. If you had a boat full of Aiden’s rowing you, you wouldn’t need to toss anyone out. Sadly, I think Dick could sense Aidan’s drive and determination and he did all he could to crush it, with varying levels of success. I’m glad to report Aidan was resilient and always bounced back.

Not only was Aidan a good worker, he was also a good and kind person. He gave off good energy, was fun to be around and motivated us all to do a good job. He cared deeply for his family and did all he could to help them out financially (even though he was in his very early 20’s). If you’re wondering why this might happen, imagine not being able to use contraception and having one breadwinner without a steady income.

Whilst he embraced his lifestyle and made the most of it, open conversations with Aidan often left me feeling upset for him. He was curious by nature. He spoke of a desire to live the city life in a skyscraper and wanted to see the world, but knew he never would. He would sometimes sneak off to places, ensuring he was back the same day so nobody had to know. These stories made me incredibly proud, even more so because I’m sure he shouldn’t have been talking to me about them, let alone doing them.

As I’ve already mentioned, Brethren’s don’t go on ‘holiday’. They are sometimes permitted (supposedly by the Elders) to go visit family that live abroad, but this is pending approval. If you’re wondering where visiting family might take you, the majority are in Australia and Canada, but conveniently there’s a settlement in the Bahamas.

Whilst we’re on the recurring theme of don’ts and don’ts, one thing I could never get my head around was that it seemed the more central to the church you were, the more allowances you had to break the rules you were supposed to live by. I began to hear of Brethren’s who had unlocked mobile phones or computers at their houses. In fact, I still have the pending friend request from Dick on FaceBook today. So, what gives?

Surely the more senior you are in the church, the more you want to abide by the rules you believe are taking you closer to God. If you don’t, and think you’re entitled to the internet (described by a Brethren leader as a pipeline to filth) then why are you even part of the PBCC?

Well, here’s where it gets tricky. Leaving is fairly non-optional for the Brethren’s. Firstly, imagine you’re born into it. You’ve been brought up your whole life believing that your little sect is right and the rest of the world is wrong & going to hell. It’s already got to take a lot to make you even consider walking away from that. You’d be walking into hell, right?

Secondly, the church doesn’t make it all that easy to leave. Let’s say hypothetically that you had an unlocked phone and you read a bunch of stuff that made you see the limitations to your life and you wanted out. If you were to act on this, you would be walking out on your family, your friends, your job and everything you have ever known. No support, no previous experience in the wider world. You’d be alone for the first time in your life. You might not be allowed any contact with family ever again (unless you wanted to rejoin).

So, is it really a choice? For many, leaving their family simply isn’t a choice. Because it’s not just being cast out, it’s knowing that your family will supposedly no longer love you. I imagine it would, at least to begin with, feel like an incredibly shameful experience. Walking away from the people you love, who will never understand your decision.

That final point, that deep down dissonance between beliefs, isn’t that the cause of all disagreements? Our beliefs & values are the reason we get so passionate, emotional, even aggressive sometimes. ‘I believe this to be so truly right that I can’t even begin to comprehend your side of the argument because your values don’t match up with mine’.

This is why pro environmentalists can’t agree on anything with climate deniers. Why ethical vegans can’t agree with meat eaters. Why people who want what’s best for themselves don’t understand the actions of people who want what’s best for all. It’s nationalists arguing against their rights with globalists. And why right wing & left wing are finding it increasingly difficult. I see it all the time when I get lost in comments threads, which I often do.

I guess what I’m trying to do here – other than to give you a hopefully fascinating insight into the lives of people you probably didn’t know existed… Is to put your choice in the limelight. To show you just how lucky you are to wake up every day and make the daily decisions that you do. Even the small ones, like having a peruse on social media, listening to music, reading the news, zoning out in front of Netflix, growing a beard or tying your hair up… You get to wake up day after day and make that choice.

Now, imagine for a second that those choices are taken away.

Put yourself in a Brethren’s shoes and take that idea for a walk. You’re not allowed to have your say. You can’t vote, or argue with the opposition. There is no opposition. There’s only one God and he’s yours. You’re going to heaven; you just have to live through this hell first.